Letters to Lincoln by Tracie Podger

Author:Tracie Podger [Podger, Tracie]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Published: 2017-07-10T18:30:00+00:00

Chapter Fifteen

Christmas week was fast approaching and with it, Christian’s mood deteriorated. I noticed Dad being cautious around him, the slightest mention of Helen or Alistair, or even Christmas, seemed to set off the explosion that had been building inside him. It was awkward, unsettling, and the atmosphere was thick with tension. There came a point when I felt my feelings were brushed aside, and although it wasn’t a competition on who was hurting the most, his anger was overriding anything anyone else felt. I’d lost my cheating husband and my child; Dad had lost his only grandchild. Yet our emotions had to be kept in check.

Christian travelled to London a couple of times, returning late at night the same day. He hadn’t travelled to see Helen but to check in with work. He’d decided to take an extended holiday, but I wondered how his boss felt about that. I was sure they’d be sympathetic to a degree, but having ‘lost’ my job when the sympathy had run out, I didn’t hold much hope in Christian returning to work full-time if he didn’t get himself back into gear.

He’d told me that he’d appointed a divorce lawyer to start proceedings, and had chuckled that he hoped paperwork would be served on her on Christmas Eve. That level of nastiness just wasn’t Christian, normally. He was determined to leave Helen with nothing financially; even though I’d pointed out she’d be entitled to half their house at least. His words that day had stunned me, ‘that bastard child will get nothing from me.’

Dad and I decided to sit in the garden wrapped up for warmth, and with a cup of tea.

“Do you still want to get a Christmas tree?” I asked.

“Do you?”

“I don’t know.”

“Neither do I. Is it wrong of me to be getting angry with Christian? I mean, both of you have been through a traumatic time, but his anger is just escalating.”

“No, it’s not wrong. It’s as if we don’t count, just his feelings. It’s getting irritating, to be honest. How about we escape for an hour or so to the pub?”

“I haven’t been to the pub for a long time. Let’s do it. But we can’t exactly go without inviting him, and right now, I’m not sure alcohol and his mood are a good mix.”

“Maybe you’re right,” I said with a sigh. It felt so wrong to be planning to sneak out of the house without him, but his depression was tiring us all out.

“I mentioned a counsellor to him but he wasn’t even prepared to listen,” Dad said.

“I don’t think Chris is the counselling type, to be honest. I think he has to work through this in his own way. What about his friends? I know he’s taken some calls, but maybe we could get in touch with a couple and see if they’d invite him out, or something.”

“Dani, he’s thirty-five, I’m sure he’d be pretty annoyed if we pulled a stroke like that.”

“Well, I think I might take a walk, do you want to join me?” I asked.

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